Only One For The Rest of Your Life

Today on my drive to Louisville I was thinking about what it would be like if I was only allowed one thing in a category for the rest of my life. For example, if I could only eat one food for the rest of my life, what would it be? Some of the categories I came up with were:

1. If I could only have one source of entertainment, would I choose a video store, a book store, or a music store? Though I love all three, I can only have one. For some people I know it would be an easy choice. My brother Andy, a professor of English Literature, would no doubt choose the book store. My friends Jerry Marotta and Roma Prindle, both professional musicians, would choose the music store. I on the other hand am blessed with no talent. Therefore it takes more thought. I decided that, like my brother, I would choose books. I love TV, but if it was the only thing I could do I think I would go more insane than I presently am.

2. If I could drink only one beverage for the rest of my life it would no doubt be coffee. I’m not talking sissy shit half decaf, high foam lattes with flavors. I’m talking a serious cup of Joe. Somewhere along the line I became a coffee addict, followed after by a love of fine coffee. I order my beans green from all over the world and roast them myself. I am one of those pretentious prigs who say stuff like, “the Africans produce a bold flavor, but the acidity is somewhat off-putting. I prefer the more mellow overtones of the South American, especially the Brazilian.”

3. If I could watch only one sport for the rest of my life it would be baseball. Baseball was my first love. I went to baseball camp for 11 summers. I played Little League. I would have played in high school but my bat developed an aversion to the ball. I was better at football and basketball but didn’t love them as much. In my macho 20’s and 30’s football became my favorite. I’ve found that as I have gotten older and slower the pace of baseball suits me better. I like the fact that each pitch is a separate act that allows enough time between them to contemplate the situation of the moment.

4. If I could eat any one food for the rest of my life I would eat Bran. Nah, I’m just kiddin’ ya! I know, and anybody who knows me knows, that I will commit crimes against nature if it meant I could have an Oreo cookie. Oreo’s are God’s perfect food!

By the time I had finished these first four, my drive to Louisville was over, so I didn’t have a chance to ponder other categories. What would your choices be?